Welcome to purposeful living today. Relationships are a blessing from God, we are to guard and protect it as a priceless treasure to us. We are all a product of relationships. Do have a lovely day and blessed weekend.

" Iron sharpeneth iron; so a man sharpeneth the countenance of his friend." Proverb 27:17.


A young girl who just gave her life to Christ was told that she had to let go of her friendship with unbelievers it will make her to live in sin and then go back to her past. She tried building friendship with some of her church members in the youth fellowship but she found it difficult to flow with them as many of them have their minds unrenewed, they still think and live like unbelievers even though they were active members in the fellowship and even anointed by God, doing great things for the kingdom. This young girl was confused on how to choose friends in her church, this made her ask the pastor of her church these questions:
Young girl: Sir,  can every christian be my friend, especially in the youth fellowship?
Pastor: No my daughter!

Young girl: Please Sir why? I read in the bible that we are all one in Christ and they are my brothers and sisters.

Pastor: Yes, it is true we are all one in Christ but when it comes to friendship we don't choose any one as a friend, we choose friends base on purpose. This is because the church is a body with different parts. So, your friends come based on the part you are in the body of Christ if not there will be misunderstanding.  In the body of Christ, the church have different doctrines, some don't believe in  wearing earrings and some do. Some don't believe in wearing shoe to church and some do. Some don't allow girls to wear trousers or pants and some do. While we still have our own personal belief about God.
Young Lady: Sir, what do you mean by purpose?

Pastor: Purpose is the reason why God created you and brought you to this world, it is the channel through which the gifts, talent and potentials in a person is expressed for the Glory of God. So you need a friend with similar purpose and belief system about God, like David and Jonathan.

Young Lady: Sir, is this the reason why I find it difficult to choose friends?

Pastor:  Yes my daughter. When you give your life to Christ, you don't just jump on anyone who is a Christian as a friend. Take out time to observe who they are; do they have character? Are they lovers of God or just church goers? What are their belief system? Are they living in integrity? Are they proud of living in sin?

My daughter don't be deceived by people who are bankrupt of character, don't fear God but they are highly anointed. It does not matter if they even raise the dead.

Young Lady: Thank you Sir, but for the past 6 months I gave my life to Christ I don't have anyone I can call my friend, though I have some acquaintance in the fellowship. It is like l am a lone in this world, because I don't have friends I  can freely share my pain, joy and dealings with God. Some of my church members call me names like "Virgin Mary, holy holy..." because l don't like their filthy talk and way of life because it is contrary to what I have read in God's word. The girls spent time gossiping the brothers in the fellowship and the brothers looking for the next beautiful sister to break her heart. Sir I don't know what to do?

Pastor: My daughter, you need to be patient. It will take time to meet the right kind of friends you want, but you must first be the right friend by being friendly (Proverb 18:24). You should spend more time with God and allow him work in you. There are friends God will send to you now that you may take for granted, this is because you have not built enough capacity to handle such great friends. Your friends are the apostles of your dreams and believes, they will walk with you in your path to fulfilling destiny. If there is one thing God wants you to do at this time is to allow him be your friend and then he will lead in His own time to the friends you need.

Let me list some attributes you need to choose friends:
1. You must both have mutual interest, dreams and goals.

2. Your friends should have the fear of God, respect their elders most especially their parents  and also respect you.

3. Choose friends that you can have fellowship together like Daniel had with Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego.

4. Friends you choose should have integrity and Character.

5. They should make you better after spending time with them and you should be able to express yourself to them at any point in time.

6. Your friends should make you draw closer to God.

7. Your friends should love you for who you are.

8. They should believe in your dreams.

9. They should have self control, should be able to understand you.

10. Your friends should celebrate not tolerate you.

My daughter no matter what people say to you, hold on to your integrity. You are not alone, God is with you always. Communicate often with people, don't isolate yourself from the  service of God in your fellowship, work with people with a joyful heart, be hospitable to people, be active in a ministry/unit in your fellowship through this God will lead you to the right friends.

Young lady: Thank you Pastor, I appreciate your counsel and will walk with it by the grace of God.

Pastor: You are welcome my daughter. I am so happy you were bold to ask this question. Many young people have been deceived and have fallen from the faith because they chose friends who were wolves in sheep clothing in the church. May the Lord deliver you from such friends in Jesus might name.
Young lady: Amen. Thanks Sir.

If you are not born again, you cannot enjoy all that God has placed in relationship; the love, the unity, the peace, the bliss, the wealth, the purpose and its fulfillment, the friendship and many others. Healthy relationships cannot be established without God in it because He is the initiator. Establish a firm and deep relationship with Him today to enjoy life. It is not too late to start afresh;

You can begin a relationship now with the Lord Jesus Christ by saying this prayer:

 Lord Jesus Christ I acknowledge that I am a sinner, I believe in your death and resurrection. I ask you to forgive me my sins, I reject the devil and all his works and l welcome the Holy Spirit into my life. I declare today I am born again and I am a child of God in Jesus name .Amen .
If you just said that prayer I welcome you to God's family. Look for a Bible believing church where God's word is taught and fellowship there.

 If you made this decision please send a mail to

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