HE/SHE IS NOT THE PROBLEM; KNOW HOW TO FIGHT THE RIGHT BATTLE

Welcome to Purposeful living today. Our mission on this blog is to inspire you through the word of God and by the power of the Holy Spirit to discover and fulfill your purpose on earth with the gifts and abilities of God in you. Our vision is to see people live a fulfilled and balanced life in all areas of life only in Christ Jesus. Join us in making our mission and vision a reality by sharing this gospel of love and purpose to your friends on your social media platforms. Thank you and God bless you. We love and celebrate you.
For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds (2 Corinthians 10:4).

Most relationships fail because people fail to access the relevant knowledge they need in order to take possession of  their relationship/marriage.

Some think they have to possess the person; which makes their lover to be obsessed with them. No one wants an intruder in their relationship. The woman doesn't want another lady to possess her man voluntarily or involuntarily. So, she takes certain actions to avoid this by asking him questions such as: who's that lady you were speaking to on phone? Oga where are you going to, who do you want to see? They don't allow their partners to have breathing space; they always want to be with him and if he refuses, they think that he is seeing someone else - couples need time alone oh!

See also: Depression a silent killer

They act as secret agents; checking his text messages, chats and going behind his back to threaten the ladies around him even when they are innocent. They can do anything, even kill  to possess their man. The irony is that these same women don't treat their husbands with respect. They nag at their husbands; they don't create a throne in their heart and home for him where he is crowned king.

They are doing things on the external to possess their man but the true possession is on the inside.


The man doesn't want another man to steal the heart of  his wife, so he tries to stop the other man - they could even fight because of her. The man becomes suspicious of his wife, he always want to know where she is and with whom. This same man finds it hard to appreciate his wife, he sees whatever his wife does for him as his right. He physically abuse his wife, he barks at her like a dog. There is no love in the relationship - the man who is  to nurture, nourish  and cherish his wife now makes her insure around him. He thinks he can possess her heart by remote controlling her like a television; she can't be won that way and he won't get the best of her treating her like a slave.


If you want to be treated as a king/queen, be the first to treat your lover that way. Love always win.

You really don't need to have physical combat with any woman or man even when you know they are going out with the one you love. Be a smart person that knows that the fight is not between you and the person going out with your lover; the fight is between you and the devil.

Read also: The value of Mystery


 Markblessing did you say the devil? Yes Sir/Ma'am. The devil wants to stop you from enjoying God's best in your relationship/marriage, so he has led your lover to an intruder, who wants to fulfill his mission to steal the peace in your relationship, kill your joy and destroy your relationship and marriage. You know what the bible says about him? - Submit yourself and your relationship to God, resist the devil and he will flee from you - not assisting the devil by acting in the flesh or how you feel (James 4:7).  It is not about the physical fight because the weapons of our welfare are not carnal but mighty through God to the pulling down of strongholds.

How do we fight the right battle?
We do this by possessing the heart of our lover through walking in love with them (Ephesians 5:2). Now when I talk about love I mean the agape love (unconditional love). Human/natural love will not be able to survive the pain, heart break of seeing someone you love going out or being lured by a deceiver. Human love will want to fight back; it will want to retaliate  and finds it hard to forgive. Human love says to the man, ”Sweet heart, if you behave well I will respect and submit to you in this house.” It says to the woman, ”Sweet heart, I will love you if only you respect me as he head of this house”. Human love has its conditions for it to be expressed. Unconditional love on the other hand which is the God-kind of love has no expectations or conditions - love is not expressed because love was given in the first place; love is expressed not minding the behavior of the other person.

See also: Why I am in love with Joy

The bible says we should guard our heart (Proverb 4:23). The heart of your lover needs to be guarded with and in love back to the path of love.


How to possess the heart of your lover:
1. Prayers is number one oh! You must intercede for your lover and get directions from God on what to do, because the arm of flesh will fail you.

2. Understand their love language and generously give to them in love. There are five love languages:

  • Word of affirmation
  • Spending quality time
  • Giving gifts
  • Service
  • Physical touch

Always give them the one you know that is their dominant love language. If you are not married, administer moderately in honour of the lord to avoid stories that touch especially when their dominant love language is 'physical touch'.

Be willing to serve your spouse or lover even when they don't deserve it.

3. Love: love has been described in 1Corinthians 13:4-7.

These are the qualities of  unconditional love you possess in your spirit that you have to allow find expression in your relationship:


  1. You're kind and patient with them when they don't deserve it.
  2. You aren't jealous or boastful about their relationship with the other person; you may feel jealous but don't act it. Acting in jealousy is an expression of anger and frustration towards them - they can't be won this way; you will only drive them out.
  3. You aren't  arrogant or rude. There are times where you have to be calm even when you need to express how you feel. You can express yourself when you aren't angry.
  4. You don't insist on your own way; we have to let go of our ”rights” and ”self” because we have the love of God shared abroad in our hearts by the Holy Spirit to  win the heart of our lover (Romans 5:5).
  5. You don't have to resent them and what they do; you have to look at them with the eyes of love that God looks at you with.
  6. You don't rejoice in the wrong things your lover has done but in the right things.
  7. You have the ability to bear, believe and hope and endure all things because all things are going to work out for your good (Romans 8:28), as you hold on to God and fight the right battle. 

You can't do the above by yourself. You need the help of the Holy Spirit to empower you to do them. If you fall rise up and hold unto God. Don't give up on a relationship/marriage that God has ordained for you except God tells you to.

See also: Why I am in love with Joy

Let's keep fighting the right battles in our relationship. I love and celebrate you.

Please you can share your thought on this topic in the comment box,I will love to learn from you.

GOD BLESSS YOU.

If you don't have a relationship with the Lord you can do that now, He is the only guarantee of the abundant supply of love, joy and peace  in your relationship.

You can begin a relationship now with the lord Jesus Christ and experience His love for you by saying this prayer:
Lord Jesus Christ I acknowledge that I am a sinner, I believe in your death and resurrection. I ask you to forgive me my sins, I reject the devil and all his works and l welcome the Holy Spirit into my life. I declare today I am born again and I am a child of God in Jesus name .Amen.

If you just said that prayer I welcome you to God's family. Look for a Bible believing church where God's word is taught and fellowship there.


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Thanks for Reading.

YOU ARE GREATLY LOVED AND HIGHLY BLESSED.


IT IS ALL ABOUT JESUS CHRIST.

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